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DAKAR (AFP/BBC Africa) – The World Sound Organization (WHO2) has rendered its verdict: Senegal has just set a historic record. With an average sound level of 128 decibels of debate per capitathe country is now officially recognized as the most talkative territory on the planet.
A speech wave detected from space
According to NASA, the satellites recorded a strange constant vibration over West Africa. After analysis, it turned out that it was... a live debate in Pikine about the quality of fragrant rice.
"We were thinking first of an earthquake or rocket launch," explains an American engineer. "But no, it was just two Senegalese people who didn't hear about cooking fish."
Dakar, world capital of the blabla
In Dakar, each intersection is a miniature TV set. In fast cars, passengers face philosophical arguments on subjects as vital as "does sugar or not have to be put in Bissap?".
Markets look like political forums:
"I don't sell vegetables anymore, I sell opinions!" says Mariama, a saleswoman at the Tilène market. "Every tomato purchased gives you the right to a free debate on the government."
Social networks transformed into a national arena
Digital platforms have become real Statements. Internet users organise daily live "talk beats": the loser is the one who ends up missing arguments or... electricity.
One of the country's most followed influencers, nicknamed "Serigne du Micro", proudly claims:
"I speak twelve hours a day, without a break, even during water cuts. If they cut me the Wi-Fi, I scream out the window."
On Facebook, a 3-month-old baby recently buzzed with his first debate: « Is breast milk really organic? ». Result: 45 000 likes and a national debate between paediatricians, marabouts and influencers.
Tik-Tok, for his part, has become the official place to settle his conflicts. No more need for mediators, courts or family assemblies: just post an incendiary video and wait for the people to divide.
Recent example: a gentleman publicly accused his wife of stealing his phone charger. Verdict: After 2,000 comments and 300 shares, the community decided that the charger belonged to... the nation and that sir should marry a second woman. An influencer lacking « Likes » applied. The second wedding was celebrated with great pomp on social networks. A few weeks later the influencer posted an incendiary video on Tik-Tok to ask for divorce because her husband did not want to offer her the iPhone 75 that would be fashionable after her girlfriends.
Debates about everything, especially nothing
The last topic was: "Does the winter wind blow from left to right or from right to left?"
Result: 48 TV shows, 10,000 Facebook comments, 3 divorces and a committed song.
"In Senegal, everything can become a debate," notes a researcher at the University of Sangalkam. "Even silence. We have had a controversy recently: some say that we must respect it, others want to remove it permanently."
Traumatized foreigners
Some tourists get upset:
"I wanted to visit the island of Gorée, but at the airport already someone asked me about my opinion on local taxation!" said a Belgian in shock.
"I stayed three weeks. I couldn't put a single word. Even my tour guide was debating... with himself."
The Japanese embassy in Dakar is said to have even opened a psychological cell for its nationals affected by "Senegal vacarma syndrome".
Experts in all, especially nothing
Senegal has set a world record: the country counts more experts than inhabitants. On each subject, from nuclear to the recipe for thieboudiene, there are at least 300 self-proclaimed specialists ready to intervene on a TV set.
A famous columnist recently confided:
— « Yesterday I was an expert in economics. Today, I am an expert in astrophysics. Tomorrow I will be an expert in crocodile management. »
The day Senegal discovered... its national dragon
For several weeks, the whole country only talked about this: the dragon of the suburbs. Yes, a real dragon, not a political metaphor or a griot joke.
Locals swore that they had seen "between the bakery and the septic tank" roam under the floors of Pikine, according to the testimonies.
In a few hours, social networks have become "International University of Draconic Sciences of Senegal": "experts in dragons", "magic fire teachers" and "marabouts specialized in mythical reptiles" have invaded TV sets.
Some claimed that the dragon was a sign of divine anger, while others saw it as a secret project of the Ministry of Energy to produce current from the draconic fire.
For two months, the country suspended its normal life: no one was talking about politics or football. — The dragon had eaten the news.
Soap saleswoman becomes national star of chatter
Among the stars of this great verbal circus, proudly thrones Awa the soap seller, now nicknamed "Awa Savon". Part of a small cosmetics shop at the Guédiawaya market, she rose to fame by shouting louder than anyone else on Tik-Tok. At first, she was just commenting on the promotions on her soaps.
Then one day, she gave her opinion on the weather, football, spirituality and even the reproduction of dragons. — All in one three-hour video. Result: a million views, a rain of red hearts, and an invitation on several TV sets.
Today, Awa no longer sells soap, she sells opinions. She became Influencer of the vacarma, adurated for its ability to turn any subject into a verbal tornado. As an astonished internet user says:
"When Awa talks, even the radio drops the volume."
Silence prohibited by unwritten decree
In some countries, silence is a sign of inner peace. In Senegal, it is seen as a serious disease. If you remain silent for more than ten minutes, your neighbors will start worrying:
— « You okay? Are you sure you don't have a problem? Why don't you talk? Right? Don't you have anything to say about Sonko, the price of a kilo of fish or the rain yesterday? »
A very serious study conducted by theInstitut National de la Parlotte (INP) reveals that 95% of Senegalese even speak while sleepingAnd that the remaining 5% speak... in their dreams.
A national heritage in the process of recognition
In the face of this phenomenon, UNESCO plans to include "Senegal art of collective chatter" World intangible heritage.
A delegation was sent to Dakar but... she never managed to finish the evaluation meeting.
"As soon as we were trying to talk, we were interrupted to explain how we could better formulate our sentence," the head of mission admits, disliked.
National sport: the free debate
Forget the traditional struggle! The real national sport is the debate. According to completely invented but credible figures, on average 14 debates per day, including 6 on the radio, 3 on Facebook, 2 at the market, 1 in a taxi and 2 in front of the evening tea (ataya).
The government is even considering a formal application to the IOC for entry of the « Senegalese free debate » at the Olympic Games.
« We already have our champions, able to speak 8 hours without taking their breath. It's a gift from God »proudly entrusts a national coach of the palace.
A Philosopher People Despite Him
The most fascinating thing is that people move at the speed of a comet. Today we debate power cuts, tomorrow we talk about the defeat of the Lions, the day after tomorrow it is the last fight in a wedding filmed on TikTok. And for a whole week, Senegal becomes the global research centre in unnecessary debates.
But be careful, do not take this chatter lightly: it is deeply cultural. In a country where orality is queen, talking is breathing. And as unemployment leaves a lot of free time, let's say frankly: the debate has become national sport. The traditional struggle? It's out of date. Here, the real fight is that of words.
We're not talking here. of life, we comment on it
Senegal, a small country at the tip of Africa, has just reached the unimaginable point: turning speech into a natural resource. After peanuts, fish and diaspora, here is the new national treasure: the argumented noise.
"At us, silence is a lack of patriotism," a Rufisque resident proudly explains. "As long as there's a microphone, there's a Senegalese to talk in."
